Read This Book Is Full of Spiders: Seriously, Dude, Don't Touch It by David Wong Free Online
Book Title: This Book Is Full of Spiders: Seriously, Dude, Don't Touch It|
The author of the book: David Wong
Edition: St. Martin's Griffin
Date of issue: October 8th 2013
ISBN 13: 9781250036650
Format files: PDF
The size of the: 658 KB
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From the writer of the cult sensation John Dies at the End comes another terrifying and hilarious tale of almost Armageddon at the hands of two hopeless heroes.
WARNING: You may have a huge, invisible spider living in your skull. THIS IS NOT A METAPHOR.
You will dismiss this as ridiculous fearmongering. Dismissing things as ridiculous fearmongering is, in fact, the first symptom of parasitic spider infection-the creature secretes a chemical into the brain to stimulate skepticism, in order to prevent you from seeking a cure. That's just as well, since the "cure" involves learning what a chain saw tastes like.
You can't feel the spider, because it controls your nerve endings. You can't see it, because it decides what you see. You won't even feel it when it breeds. And it will breed. So what happens when your family, friends, and neighbors get mind-controlling skull spiders? We're all about to find out.
Just stay calm, and remember that telling you about the spider situation is not the same as having caused it. I'm just the messenger. Even if I did sort of cause it.
Either way, I won't hold it against you if you're upset. I know that's just the spider talking.
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Read information about the authorDavid Wong is the pseudonym of Jason Pargin. He is the Executive Editor of Cracked.com, author of John Dies at the End and the New York Times bestseller This Book is Full of Spiders. His third novel, Futuristic Violence and Fancy Suits debuted on October 6 2015.
John Dies at the End was adapted into a feature film and debuted at the Sundance film festival in 2012.